after thanksgiving, finals and stress

It's almost December.



*Maddash/scrabbletowardstheend.*

I think I can get through two more weeks of school, although I'm starting to get stress dreams. For instance, I dreamt that we were all under nuclear attack and trapped in a building while watching people turn to dust outside in all the fumes and gas. In another, I dreamt that I couldn't finish my French directed studies work and flipping out because of it. I wonder if I actually sleep talk or hit things. One day I should get a recorder and tape myself during sleep. It's like running a marathon, slow but surely. Although I'm beginning to run out steam....and I feel like the train from Dumbo, the one climbing that long, steep hill chanting "I think I can, I think I can." I'm pretty sure I've lost my motivation in some of my classes.

Things I need to do before leaving in January:

- Finish my Fall semester with a bang
- Buy my plane ticket DONE
- Find housing in Geneva DONE
- Get my visa
- Finish packing to move out

I don't think the stress of moving and leaving is catching up to me yet. I've started my housing search, and have been searching since October, but somehow I haven't been stressed about it yet. But soon, there's going to be christmas things to be worried about, speaking of which, I must go set up my tree.

It's finally beginning to smell like winter time, the smell and sound of Christmas...or that could just be my own imagined smell....Nonetheless, every time I go outside when it gets dark, I breathe in the fresh, crisp fall air, with a hint of burning wood and sweetness. I love the feeling of leaves crunching underneath me. After the craziness of school is over, I plan to read, have coffee and take a long break before I start working. Also, I got a new phone, which I've been adding pictures of Lyon like crazy.

Yesterday, there was another event that cemented my resolve of not ever living in Dublin/Pleasanton again. I just saw one of my high school teacher. Granted, it's been 4 years and I don't think she remembers me at all, to my relief. I was that sole senior in her class taking Spanish because I thought it'd be fun after finishing French. I remember her being the teacher that couldn't control her class.

Oh, and I finally given up on telling people what my major is. I've been getting blank stares or stuff like, oh, you look like such an innocent girl to be doing nonproliferation stuff. Well, is that so?

Two more weeks. I think I can.